The Silence of the Spectator

Q. What does one do when a beautiful young girl waves at you?

Option 1: Wave back!
Option 2: Look around to make sure its you, wave back!
Option 3: Grin like an Idiot but still wave back!
Option 4: None of the above. (That's a thumbs down)

Life is full of surprises, it's more a game of incredibly funny rules. A game of hide and seek! That's the best way to look at it. At its simplest form there are just the two kinds, the runners, who keep running away from almost anything and on the other end we have the seekers, who try to find more without running too far away! So the fundamental point I am trying to make is that one needs to run in any role. The moment one stops running, life begins!

What does it take to stay positive and keep dreaming? Do we have to go back to being a baby again? Probably yes.... The infant knows no fear, carries no baggage and sleeps peacefully! A deadly combination.

If one is, still running, in the game; it seems very important to stay ahead. The ones who fall back are left behind. That is worth fearing. To overcome this, one needs constant up gradation. The willingness to change! Interestingly none of us are happy to change. Someone once said "The only person who welcomes a change is a wet baby!" The mammoth baggage we keep adding to the already huge one we tend to carry weighs us down. This fear coupled with the crippling baggage makes one forget the simple mantra, the precursor to having great dreams - We forget to sleep!

I had this dream this evening, while riding a motorcycle and simultaneously balancing two of the Ten feet wide banners, there was too much of traffic in the entire stretch and I was forced to stop at the signal at the end of this narrow road. The claustrophobic effect made me think of the 600 odd friends on my Facebook. What if I get to 1000 friends first and then manage to make them contribute Rs 1000 each, and match each contribution my self. If I maintain this in a savings account then I will be sitting on at least 20,00,000. That my dear friends will be good enough for any cause!

All this thrilled me to no end....That was when it happened for the first time in eight years..... A beautiful young girl waved at me from a passing automobile...... I am sure that I registered the "I am the President of the Stupid Club" expression on my face. If there is such a club I would have done them mighty proud! For some strange reason my attention was diverted to the white car she was travelling in... I did not take in the details.... I don't even know if she was even vaguely familiar to me. I don't know why I froze.... May be it was John Lennon signing "Watching the wheels" inside my head..... I am usually not good with names, but never forget a face! I am still breaking my head to remember the face! All this has left me sleepless at 2 in the morning....

Now, this made me realise that I am still in the run, life has not begun yet! John Lennon has to wait a little bit more for me to join his circus...

If she knows me well...then all I can say now is....I am sorry....., I will never forgive myself for choosing option 4!

P.S. The Lyrics of "Watching the Wheels" By John Lennon.

People say I'm crazy doing what I'm doing
Well they give me all kinds of warnings to save me from ruin
When I say that I'm o.k. well they look at me kind of strange
Surely you're not happy now you no longer play the game

People say I'm lazy dreaming my life away
Well they give me all kinds of advice designed to enlighten me
When I tell them that I'm doing fine watching shadows on the wall
Don't you miss the big time boy you're no longer on the ball

Ah, people asking questions lost in confusion
Well I tell them there's no problem, only solutions
Well they shake their heads and they look at me as if I've lost my mind
I tell them there's no hurry I'm just sitting here doing time

I'm just sitting here watching the wheels go round and round
I really love to watch them roll No longer riding on the merry-go-round
I had to let it go. I had to let it go. I had to let it go...

Fate; Ate fat tea!

For all those of you who believe in fate, and for all those of you that believe in a written destiny, A very good Evening!

The whole idea is nauseous. I fail to give into fate because I do not believe that I am not in control of my life. I am directly responsible for most of what happens to me. Fate and destiny is not an excuse for all sour grapes that I cannot reach. If there is a written destiny for even simple things like me going out a door, climbing down a flight of stairs, starting a motorcycle and reaching home, then imagine the time and energy that would have gone into writing this down somewhere. The unbelievable size that volume will run into and multiply that with all the human lives on earth, then the insects, plants, animals, microbes.....I do not believe that such a huge all containing volume ever exists.

What I believe in, has a fairly simple outline. I make this list of what I need and over that what I want. The balancing list of my strengths and areas of opportunities, the broad outline of the plan, a fixed timeline, the unrelenting effort, focus and commitment while giving the best shot. If all does not end as well as what one imagined, fate and destiny is not the escape I want to take. I will rather get back to the drawing board and start with a fresh list.

At times, we just have this big plan for the next great step and we do not think beyond it. What if we get there faster then what we expect. What next then? It is more important to at least think a few steps ahead. To know what to want next after getting to the immediate next.

This is how Vishwanathan Anand plays chess, he is sure to think at least eight moves ahead. When one does that any strange coincidence will not be required in the form of fate and destiny.

The bell will never ring and we all will keep going on..

Arranged Murders

I am brave, sometimes shamelessly brave. I am not even afraid of my conscience and very few things scare me. With that preamble, one should imagine that the world I inhabit would actually be heaven.

They say, “Marriages are made in Heaven”. They also say that “Marriage is an Institution” while “Love is blind!” Now, this makes me wonder if “Marriage is an institution for the blind.”

I do not think marriages are made in Heaven. I have always believed that all marriages are arranged marriages. The question really is who is arranging it? In the land of arranged marriages, especially if it’s the parent’s generation that is trying to arrange the marriage, the young man at the marriageable age is rather in an interesting situation. It is a rather funny choice knowing well that neither of the options is ideal and that there is no other option. One either gets married or stays a bachelor. This is when the juggling of the Pros and Cons start happening. It will be great to have new home, start your family, bliss, something to come back to, something to complete the otherwise meaningless life, a purpose. But, on the other hand there is no more of the late night hangouts, indulgent binges, careful financial planning, saving, compromises, sacrifices, loss of space, reckless split second decisions. As that young man in the picture, I am not afraid of all these. Somehow the sense of Déjà vu sweeps me completely. What I am afraid of is the numerous atrocities that happen to women in the name of Marriage.

It is well known that a marriage changes the life completely. It changes the women’s life much more than it does to the man. Somehow or the other she is made to sacrifice much more, in terms of education, career, hobbies, interests, friends, family, preferences and passion. Starting from there to ill-treatment at the hands of in-laws, abuse, and husband addicted to alcohol, wife beating, physical and psychological torture, dowry deaths, gas stove explosions, forced abortions, female infanticide and even sati. These horrors scare me and I am even more afraid when the girl’s own family fails to stand up for her. Are their responsibilities over the moment she is married off and sent to the groom’s house? I am even more afraid when brothers, mothers, fathers, sisters, uncles and aunts stand a dumb witness to all these horrors. Keeping quiet about a crime is worse than perpetrating the crime. These, ultimate at times stupid acts of sacrifice by the women around me gives me the chills.

Marriages don’t scare me, I am not afraid of arranged marriages. I am afraid, very afraid of ARRANGED MURDERS!

When you communicate with god....

As told to Aneesh and other mind openers on 27th July by our beloved Doc.....Actually not exactly as told as this is more an attempt to capture the essence of my own interpretation....

"When one starts communicating with God, one has to be very careful. Not just about what is being said but on how it may imply something else. Just like it happened to this young boy who got his wish for ten days of penance. After 30 such days of hardship he had truly earned his three wishes.
He wished for

1. A large bag full of money,

2. To be surrounded by a lot of women and

3. To travel in a large automobile.

His wish was granted... He became the conductor of a ladies special bus!

Sometimes, communication can go haywire when we try talking to god. Have we ever imagined what happens when god tries to communicate to us? I guess we neither imagine such rarities and nor prepare for such unlikely event.

More often than not this is what happens...as it does with most mobile operators.

1. Youth - The customer you are trying to reach is not reachable.

Between ages 5 and 25, we end up spending a lot of our time with the so called friends in all kinds of places like the beach, the park, the playground, the cinema hall and where not. Invariably we end up in area's that do not have any kind of network coverage for god to reach you.

2. Middle Age - The customer you have called is busy on another call.

Between ages 25 and 55, we are running so much and attending to all kinds of calls from work and family, walking a tight rope to make odds and ends meet that god is invariably waiting on the second line. Invariably god keeps waiting patiently for as long.

3. Old- The number you have called is switched off.

After 55, we also desperately want to have a word with the creator. By now, of course we have exhausted all the charge on the battery that when god tries reaching, you have switched of already.

Here is how it looks now; "Man" the most intelligent of the Lord's creation in never there when god tries to reach. Under some rare coincidence, when you are within the coverage area, with full charge and no other call, there is that call from God that is all there to be answered. So, always be prepared to communicate with your creator. Communication is not just about concept or clarity, it is more about connecting first."

Traffic lights and Cricket on Rainy Days

I love rain but as a marketing professional, that the world thinks I am, one has to believe in the following three rules for rainy days!

Rule 1: Light coloured trousers.
By some strange combination of luck and unfortunate coincidence there is just that one light colour trouser in the dresser that has to be worn to work. The combination more often than not comes in shades of beige, cream, off-white, dull brown and pale khaki. All of them look great while wet and splashed with grime around the ankle and few feet upwards.

Rule 2: Field Day
However hard one tries, there is that inevitable commute to all possible locations the entire day. The work itself if indoor gets done at record speed and there by adds to the out door time. When it rained the other day, my boss found out my secret mantra to save all the field work for the rainy days.

Rule 3: Traffic light count meter
This rule works if and only if one commutes on a motorcycle. One always happens to catch the short amber and the subsequently long red. Amidst all these drama, the lucky bloke catches the fleeting glimpse of what is there of the green. One remembers the sum of all red lights waited at and the grand total of the seconds (that always happens to run into minutes) under the unabashed fury of the rain god.

When all seems lost if simple precautions like rain coats are forgotten there still is a glimmer of hope on these rainy days.

With a slight drizzle, on a pitch that holds well, the batsman takes guard on the leg stump. He wipes away the last droplets of rain from his forehead and prepares to face the rushing fast bowler. For all that it was worth, the bowler dishes out a full length ball on the fifth stump line. With a large smile painted from one ear to the other, the batsman obliges. With a flourish, quickly on to the front foot, he launches himself in to a glorious cover drive. Wastes the first of the next four seconds to complete the all important follow through and an nod of satisfaction, proceeds to waste the next thinking if only Rahul Dravid got to see this one, and the third wondering why his team mate is screaming half way down the pitch and the last one realising that there is a single that can still be pinched. In the ensuing casual trot to the other crease, a clean fielding effort combined with a razor sharp throw and the swift removal of the bails, amidst a last moment dive to ground the bat, the field umpire is now put in a spot of bother. These days technology comes running to the rescue as soon as the third umpire is signalled for. There is just the two bulbs, green and red. After being there at red for a long time it finally turns green, much to the delight of the batsmen. The customary cheer from the audience is missing only to be replaced by a dozen honking horns. Excuse me now...Honking horns in the middle of a cricket pitch? That is when I opened my eyes to the green traffic light and the fourth rule.

Rule 4 : Dozing of at the wrong time.....